In the universe, there are certain inevitable cycles of events. Day follows night, Spring follows Winter, and vast downpours of rain follows hanging your clothes out on the washing line. But in these modern times, new cycles exist too, and so it is that for every cheap listing day on eBay, approximately 10 to 12 days later the many Post Offices up and down the land soon fill up with people posting off their successfully sold items of tat.
It was with this in mind, therefore, that the King of Postage made another trip to his local Posterie this afternoon. Unseen forces had clearly reduced the crowds beforehand, in order not to impede the King's progress, and so it was that once more his Imperial Majesty took his place in the queue. While, as outlined before, the King could just dump his packages and leave, he enjoys spending time with non-Kings, observing their behaviour.
Ahead of him in the queue today, the King observed a young couple with several packages to send. Yes, you can always spot a fellow eBay seller, especially 10 to 12 days after a cheap listing day. It was clear that they were moderately serious about the endeavour, also, having wrapped several of their items in those shiny blue mailing bags that (as cycle follows cycle) you can only seem to buy on eBay.
The King was pleased for these youngsters, starting out on what I am sure will be a long and successful career of eBay selling. But it was clear that they still had things to learn, because, once again, they were handing over their packages one at a time, asking the lady behind the counter to weigh it and say how much the stamps would be. They had brought unstamped packages into the Post Office! In the presence of the King!
Ordinarily this would be some kind of Imperial Offence, but the King Of Postage is a merciful King, and took no sanction against the young couple. Instead, with perfect timing, he approached the serving window next to them, which had just become available, and uttered the immortal words.
"Can I drop these in, please? They all have stamps on already."
The lady behind the counter was clearly delighted at the King's thoughtfulness, and so it was once more that the imperial packages were passed over. The young couple alongside could only look on in awe as the King's business was done with speed and efficiency. They will also have noticed the King's use of those same shiny blue mailing bags that even they, as ordinary people, have access to. The lady gazed at me, admiringly, no doubt resolving to bash her boyfriend over the head once they got home, and wanting to know why they can't put stamps on their parcels BEFORE entering the Post Office, in a similarly Kingly fashion.
"Hail to the King!", I am sure several people said, just after I left the premises, my business complete for another day.
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